As the title suggests the following are things that for, some strange reason, frighten me. I don't know why I feel like writing this, but I was thinking about odd things that just freak me out. So here it is:
1. The bathroom at the McDonald's. You know those horror movies where the hero walks into a room that has stark lighting and there is the low hum of machinery in the background? Yeah, that's how this one particular McDonald's bathroom is lit. Also, when I walked in all the doors to the stalls were slightly ajar and a little off, making it even more creepy. The whole time I was expecting something to jump out and drag me off.
2. Dreams where the rooms are darkly lit and have objects you wouldn't normally expect to find in them. For example, I had a dream the other night that there was a secret room at my job. The room was dim and stacked upon themselves were these potty training chairs for little kids. And I don't know why! I'm not afraid of using the bathroom, the dark or even children, but it scared the crap out of me. No lies! In my dream I wanted out of there as fast as possible!
3. Running away from people. Well, you'd expect this to be a normal fear, but it isn't. When I was younger I had a friend named Annie. One day, while hanging out at Annie's house, she convinced me that she was a vampire (I was seven, okay) and chased me all over her house. Her house was big and there was a lot of unknown stuff that scared me about it to begin with, but her chasing me made it even worse. I was literally scared of her. I'm still scared when people chase me, even if it is just play. There is something about it that frightens me. It kicks into gear that fight or flight response and I run like I have no choice. Which leads to asthma attacks.
4. Men. Especially men I find attractive. I have been treated rather poorly by the male gender for a good portion of my existence. I've been used, abused and what have you. They not only make me incredibly nervous, but sometimes I'm flat out scared of them. I never purposefully choose to be alone with a man, unless I've known him for a decent chunk of time. Even then, I'm still wary. I've had 3 boyfriends. One of them doesn't even count because I was 10. My second did the most damage. Now I'm with Donnie. And I was scared of him when we met, aside from finding him rude. The problem is, when I'm attracted to a man, I feel even more vulnerable and therefore, more afraid. When I am vulnerable what could he do to me? I'm not a very strong person, I'm also not fast. I feel trapped sometimes, depending on the man.
5. Worms. Not going to lie, but when I was younger I could handle hooking worms for fishing, but now I can't touch one without freaking out. Part of this is because of an incident where I had a panic attack at church involving worms. A guy friend of mine, John, put worms on me while I wasn't looking and freaked me out. I screamed and ran off crying. I was already having a manic/depressive day that day and that sent me right over. I spent the better part of the rest of the service in the bathroom trying to gain some composure, telling myself that I'm not actually afraid of worms. Just when they touch me... Anyway, I haven't hooked my one worms for fishing since.
No comments:
Post a Comment