Lemon Stealing Whores

I blogged about James Deen (the porn star) recently, though he was more an afterthought in that blog. Anywho, part of the reason I blogged about him was because of an article I read about him doing a casting call for ladies, like myself, to do amateur sex scenes with him for his personal Porno web site.

Well, obviously I had to get to know Mr. Deen a bit better, so I've been reading his Twitter and his blog. It was on his blog that I discovered this totally safe for work gem of a video.

Or should I say, re-discovered. This video was featured in a Cracked.com article about such silly pornography premises... For some reason I can't find said article now, but to be fair, Cracked writes a lot about porn... More than I do anyway.

Anyway, here is the video.



That was awesome wasn't it? Now, do you want to get to know a bit of the guy who was in that? I certainly did, which is why I've been kind of stalking his blog and reading his twitter. Well, if you are interested, like I was, here is a very interesting interview with James Deen. I hope you enjoy it as much as Donnie and I did.

My Heart

Gorgeous Cover of a Paramore song by a lovely young soul named Gabrielle Alpin. Enjoy!

The Real Happy Ending

So LED posted this video on her Facebook page and I absolutely LOVE it! It is perfect in everyway really! (I don't really agree with his assessment of Obama, but it is hilarious in context!)

For your enjoyment, the real story behind the Disney happy endings!

America

"Why did you even come here?" she snarled, her lips twisting in anger. "You don't belong. None of you do."

"I've come, looking for America." I replied, my English pained and stilted. How could I ever explain that my dreams were filled with this place, filled with all the joys and dreams of generations? How could I explain her own great-grandparents' joy and desperation as they crossed the waters, their eyes searching for the bright torch of Liberty?

This land, soaked with dreams and tears, the hopes of generations drenching the earth until it is burgeoning with it. Like a rose in full bloom. And, like a rose, the thorns of prejudice pierce my fragile skin. They all stare at me, their eyes full of hatred and bias. I can't describe the dream that I followed here. The belief that I fought so hard to maintain.

The dream that America is a mother with her arms flung open wide to embrace her weary children. The torch of home burning through the mists and the fog, the moon competing with it. With this belief, we ran and fought, screaming and dying for the dream of America. A dream of freedom and liberty. A dream of acceptance and love beyond our faults. The dreams being crushed in the fists of the woman in front of me.

She hates me, for no reason other than I am different. I am not from here. I am not "American." I've lived here for five years now, I'm only a short way away from being a full citizen, but I'll never be "American." I'll never be what she believes I should be because I am different, because I was not born here.

I ignore her, my eyes straying toward the torch held aloft. I smile, though the tears are dripping down my face, stung by her words and the dreams that slowly die. The light I followed here, to escape the starvation and the crush of dreams deferred, has been burnt out for years. The America I dreamed is a dream that has died. I close my eyes and feel the incessant throb in my chest, my broken heart refusing to give up on this dream.

I look into the eyes of Liberty, her torch held aloft. Her words echo in the still waters of my mind. "Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free; The wretched refuse of your teeming shore, Send these, the homeless, Tempest-tossed to me I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"

I've gone to look for America.

Pretty.

You will be "pretty" intelligent! You will be "pretty" creative! You will be "pretty" AMAZING! But you will NEVER be merely "pretty."

Wicked Games we play

Wicked games we play with each other's hearts. Isn't it funny? Isn't it rich? You tell me you love me, but you never really meant it. We never meant the things we said, but those are the wicked games we play. Like hearts aren't fragile, like falling in love is easy and falling out of love even easier. I didn't want to fall in love with you. I didn't want to turn my heart inside out and show all of its contents to you.

I am ablaze and you are the only saviour from this devastatingly beautiful madness. Its a wicked game, sweetheart, the lies we tell. What an evil thing to do, letting me believe you could ever love me the way I love you. What tangled webs we weaved playing these games of heart and heart-break. I'm losing, but I feel like I've won the whole world in a paper cup.

The moon is on fire, a jewel on the neck of the sky, surrounded by diamonds. You are my moon, my sun, my beginning and my end. The wicked games we played, no longer pretend. Save me, save me from you. Save me from this breathtaking insanity. I don't want to be in love with you. I don't want to bathe in your scent, like it is frankincense or myrrh. I don't want to drink you down as though I was lost in the desert with no water. Yet, you are the sweetest thing I've ever tasted and yours is the only perfume I want.

I don't want to fall in love with you and the wicked games we played, knowing they could never be true.

Stuck in the Caverns of my Head

A sad tale, to be sure, I am currently being plagued by a severe case of writer's block and depression. No, I don't know why I'm depressed, I just am. I've been thinking a lot lately and I think I just think too much.

I feel like such a disappoint me sometimes. I've tried so hard to accomplish something, something to make my parents proud, make my grandparents proud, hell, make ME proud. I have yet to feel like I've done that. Though my mother and my step-father tell me all the time how proud they are of me.

One of the few things I don't like about my recent conversion to Islam is not showing my hair. I kind of miss doing cute things with my hair where people other than my husband can see it. I know wearing hijab isn't required to be a practicing Muslim, but I kind of enjoy wearing it. I feel more secure in it, even though I miss showing my hair.

I am surprised by how passionate I've become about Islam. I have always had a deeper desire to learn about it. A deeper desire to explore. I just didn't realize how much I would love my experiences with it. Even the bad ones. They have made me something more than I was. And I am okay with that. I feel like in some ways I have become better. In other ways I know I still need growing and maturing. Its a funny thing discovering that you are never as mature as you think you are. I still have so much growing up to do, in spite of all the growing I thought I had already done.

I have been thinking about guns, wars, hates and gods. I've been thinking about this world with all the people in it, all the beautiful things we could learn, and we still can't love each other. It hurts. I'm not sure why, but it does.

I have been dreaming about death and sadness. I wonder if it is an omen of things to come or a representation of my current surroundings.

A prevailing thought is that I have to be brave in the face of what I don't know. I have to keeping going forward because I am so close to something, even though I don't know what it is. I am standing on a precipice and all I hear is "I'm not going to fall, I can't."

And in the midst of all this, I hear Josh Groban singing "Brave." And I know those lyrics fit me somehow, but my puzzle is incomplete.

Let Me Cry

I heart Jang Geun Suk. And for some reason I seem to have this song on repeat. I'm not sure if it is because I want to cry on his shoulder or just because. I'm going to say it is because he is sexy.

Trying.

Marriage is hard. Relationships are hard. Love is hard. If you love someone you have to work at your relationship with them.

I once wrote a blog about Love. It's one of the few things I am very proud of, actually, because I wrote about what I see as a basic truth. You have to give all the parts of yourself to a relationship before you can truly have a relationship. So, what happens after you are in love?

That's when the work begins. Being in love is so much harder than most people realize. It's easy to play at love when you think there is no work to it. Its easy to use someone and play with their feelings. It takes real strength of character to make a relationship last.

I feel like this is what this video is about by P!nk. It's a good video. I don't like the song as much as some of her other's, but I adore this video because it is about working through the shit and working through the hard and the terrible and trying even when you feel like giving up.

Where there is a flame someone is bound to be burned.

Being a Lover of Strings

Whilst dawdling on YouTube, I somehow managed to stumble upon this Violinist named Lindsey Stirling. She isn't just any violinist however, she is a "dubstep" violinist. And her music is AMAZING! So have a listen to my newest favorite song, even if it is violin instead of cello!

It could happen to you.

Many of you, I'm sure, are wondering why I keep "harping" on the topic of Equal rights for Homosexuals, Bisexuals, Transgenders and Heterosexuals. The reason for this is because it is very close to my heart. Not just because I'm bisexual.

I come from a family where Homosexuality is actually a statistic. 1 in 3 children on my mother's side of the family is homosexual. I've grown up surrounded by people who were homosexual and you know they are the most loving and wonderful people I've ever met!

Dick
I had a homosexual great-uncle on my Grandpa's side (my mother's father), who sadly passed away before I got the chance to really know him. He worked in radio, he had been in the army. He loved Audrey Hepburn. And he had a wonderful partner. I have pictures of them and myself when I was a baby.

Becky
I had a great-aunt who was a lesbian on my Grandmother's side (my mom's mom), who also passed away, very recently. She was in the air force when she was young. She was a wild child who loved her family very much. She was a funny dancer and had a great sense of humor. I have pictures of her and Hannah (when Hannah was two or so) dancing at a cousin's wedding.

Janice
I have another great-aunt who is a lesbian (on my Grandmother's side). She has been with her partner for longer than I have been alive. They have always been there for one another and, though they are conservative in their public displays of affection, anyone who has been around them for very long can tell that they love each other. That they have always loved each other. I have pictures of us playing together, along with me crawling into their dog, Posha's house.

Kevin
And lastly, I have another great-uncle (also on my Grandmother's side). He is funny and wears some inappropriate "Gumby" t-shirts. He took care of Becky, his sister, right up until the end. He and the rest of my family have always worked together, no matter the disagreements, no matter the disputes. Because we are a family!

We are not any less just because we happen to love someone of the same sex. We do not deserve to fight and die for a country that refuses to give us the same rights! We deserve to get married and have spousal rights and be in love with who we want to be in love with.

Which brings me to why I am talking about this today.

I was on Facebook and one of my girlfriends posted the following link and I clicked on it.

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/452010736/bridegroom-an-american-love-story

And what I found made me want to cry and made me feel sick and made me angry. It also made me think and it made me wonder.

I have been surrounded by homosexuality my whole life. I have family that I love dearly (even though we don't get to see each other as much as we would like) who are homosexual or bisexual. I have so many friends that I couldn't possibly live without who are homosexual or bisexual. What happens if they are in a committed relationship and something happens? What happens to them because they have no legal rights? What happens?

This is the full video as posted by Shane about the love of his life, Tom Bridegroom. And this is what happens if you have no legal rights regarding the person you love.




This is a very powerful story, and very sad. You may disagree with what someone chooses to do with their life, but it is THEIR life, not yours. And they deserve the same rights and freedoms you have.

So I am asking you, please, if you have ever loved someone who was Homosexual, Bisexual, Transgendered OR even Heterosexual (because this is a story that affects us all) watch (and re-watch) those videos and then make the decision of whether you are willing to help out.
 
For those of you who are wondering, yes, I did pledge some money as a backer. I wouldn't ask anyone to pledge money to a cause I, myself, had not pledged something to. I didn't pledge much, because I am poor, but what I gave was from the heart and that is all that matters in the end.
 
I want to see this film in the fall, and if we raise enough awareness that can be a reality.

I want to see my family and friends happily married even though they love someone of the same gender. Even though they love someone of a different color. Even though they love someone of a different religion. Love is love.

Equal Love, Equal Rights.

Do You Remember?

I stumbled upon this song whilst exploring a side of YouTube I've never been to before.

In many ways this experience is like stumbling into an older section of a magnificent library and suddenly discovering thousands of books you want to read. You are lost in this wonderland with absolutely no desire to leave it.

That's what happened when I came across this little appreciated part of YouTube.

How did I find these songs, you may ask? By following a friend of mine through the proverbial rabbit hole. She posted a song. A song by the young woman that I am about to post. I listened to it and liked it. I then clicked on like videos and the next thing I knew I was lost and in love with the feeling.

I found a group called Starfucker and one called Hungry Ghosts (which inspired a poem for my previous post). I have fallen in love with this little niche of music, so the next few days expect music you've probably never heard (unless you are my little sister who digs the indie scene).

For now, I would like to present Ane Brun with the song "Do You Remember?"

Leonard Nimoy FTW

The following video is riotously funny and once again Leonard Nimoy has proved why he is one of my favorite people of all time. ^_^

Lazy Song by Bruno Mars. Video starring Leonard Nimoy in his pj's.

Zero Gravity

I believe I have blogged about Kerli before... At least, I think I have. Yes? Who knows! Anywho, I'm going to now!

Kerli is a singer from Estonia. As she points out in one of her songs "Nobody knows where its at," which is unfortunately rather true. Anyone out there ever heard of Estonia before now? No? Okay, brief, but necessary, geography lesson to commence in 3... 2... 1...

Estonia is located in the Baltic region of Northern Europe. Yep, its a European country. So whatever you were thinking it was before, wipe it out and try again. Finland is north of it and Sweden lies just across the Baltic from it. So now you know where it is.

Anyway, beside the point, Kerli is pretty cool. She has a very interesting vocal style as well as fashion style... I read a lot (A LOT) of comments about how she is like Lady Gaga in this particular video. I disagree, because she isn't nearly Lady Gaga outrageous. Plus I like her music a lot more than Gaga's. No offense, of course. I like Mother Monster as much as the next idiot, but I hate her videos. She isn't real in them. At all. Not even a little bit. She is just shock value. Which wears off after a while.

Once again, beside the point. I love the sound of this song and am meh about the video itself. I love being on an odyssey with Kerli, weightless in Zero Gravity.



If you find that you enjoyed this song, you should also check out "Love is Dead."

Take it all away

Today's song is one that my sister introduced me to. I really enjoy its soft lilt and the lyrics. Plus the male and female vocals blend and compliment each other so beautifully. At any rate, I just like it a lot.

"I don't feel it anymore" by William Fitzsimmons feat. Priscilla Ahn

The Right to Freedom

Right now there are men fighting over who should have to provide birth control, over birth control being taken away, over sex being diminished to simple procreation. Men are fighting over whether women should be able to have an abortion or use birth control. MEN. Not WOMEN.

Woman was created from Man's rib, says the Bible. This is to mean that woman is to be at man's side, not in front or behind him. Equal with him. Man may have been created first, but what is Man without Woman?

Is it a man who suffers through Menstruation? Is it a man who suffers through pregnancy and child-birth? Is it a man who can suffer from cysts on the ovaries, the cervix or the uterus? Or endometriosis? Is it a man who is being denied the ability to decide?

No. It is women. It is women who need birth control to help with the horrific, searing, pain of cysts on various internal organs. It is women who need birth control to help control cramping and blood loss. It is women who need birth control to prevent pregnancy. And it is women who should decide.

This is what the women before us fought for. The freedom to decide. To vote, to choose. To be equal citizens.

And we still aren't EQUAL. We still make less money than a man in the same position. We still have to beg and plead and fight to have our medicines provided by insurance and companies that don't want to give it. We are STILL fighting what should've ended a long time ago.

To Whom it May Concern,

A friend of mine posted a video on their FaceBook with the comment: "I see nothing offensive about that comment.....it worked!"
The video has to do with Birth Control, a rather popular topic at the moment. The video pisses me off immensely, but I'll let you decide for yourself about it


Now, in response to both her comment (and the video) I posted this:
"I do, because not everyone who is using contraception is using it to prevent pregnancy. There are some of us who have medical conditions that require birth control to help.
Speaking as someone who has awful cysts on my ovaries and needs to be on a contraceptive, this kind of thinking is not only very crude, but also harmful to those of us who AREN'T going out and slutting it up."

As of this moment she has yet to respond. That's right, a woman posted that. A woman that I love and, usually, admire greatly. Not only does this sadden me immensely, but really shows how we haven't come very far at all. We are still trapped in this mind set that a young woman who needs a contraceptive is a whore and should just keep her knees together.

Here is my opinion on the matter. Take it or leave it, agree or disagree, it doesn't matter. What does matter is that someone needs to take a stand on this.

To whom it may concern,
If you provide insurance to your employees you HAVE to provide for ALL types of healthcare. Not all women who use birth control use it to prevent pregnancies. It is NOT a violation of your religious rights, but it IS a violation of their freedom of choice if you refuse. If you want to be jerks about it, how about paying some taxes so these health items can be obtained some other way without breaking someone?
Thank you for your attention,
Sincerely,
Sarai

I Wanna Dance with Somebody

In honor of Whitney Houston's passing I wanted to post a song that I enjoyed by her. I love her vibrancy in this video. As well as the song itself, because in the end we all want to dance with someone who loves us.

Rest in Peace, Whitney.

Cello Wars (Or how I learned to love the accordion)

The other night I was really in the mood for cello music. Which happens frequently, actually. I love the cello. It is one of my favorite instruments. The others also being stringed instruments. But that is for a different blog.

I didn't come across the following music video first. I saw it after listening to another video from the same channel. The Piano Guys are pretty amazing, what can I say?

So, for your enjoyment, nerdiness and what-not: Cello Wars: The Phantom Cellist.

Random is as Random does.

On a random music kick (and while attempting to write Chapter Nine) I rediscovered my love for the Japanese Visual Kei group Mucc. Completely by accident mind you. I didn't even realize it was Mucc at first, because the titles were in Japanese. I was just clicking and listening really. Which is how I find most of my music, but that is beside the point.

It is while I'm randomly clicking that I find a song that I really, really, like. It isn't the Mucc I'm used to. It is softer and sweeter sounding. At least in my opinion. I remember not being overly fond of Mucc because there was a lot of unnecessary screaming involved. But in this song there isn't any screaming.

Unfortunately, YouTube won't let me embed the video, but you can follow this link:
http://youtu.be/QzBrVL41a00

Beautiful song, I think. I really like it.

I think I'm going to be on a Mucc kick for a little bit. And to think, this started off as a Kagrra, kick!