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Chapter Twelve: How to Kill a Bitch
“Well my pretty,” said Twink. “See this beautiful hourglass? It has exactly two hours of sand in it. When it runs out you will become my dinner and I’ll have the shoes because you are dead. Isn’t that lovely?”
“You are one really sick bitch, you know that right?” replied Pomme, spitting at Twink.
Twink came up close, too close for Pomme’s taste because the smell of rot and hypocrisy made her gag, and grabbed Pomme’s chin forcing her to look into the Wicked Bitch’s eyes.
“Oh darling, You haven’t seen anything yet. Toodles!” And with that Twink disappeared, slamming the door behind her and locking it.
Left alone in the silence, Pomme finally began to really cry.
“I’m scared Auntie Fawn! I’m scared! God, I’m scared. I don’t know where Sarai is, she could have died from an asthma attack and I wouldn’t know. I don’t know where the guys are and I never got to tell Gackt that he is a great kisser, or to kiss him again. Auntie Fawn, Uncle Aoi! Help me, I don’t know what to do.”
“Auntie Fawn, Auntie Fawn!” cackled Twink, her horrifying visage appearing in the crystal triangle behind her. “Nothing is going to save you now lovely. By the way, do you want to be barbecued or slow roasted?”
With that, the image disappeared and Pomme was left alone to watch the sand falling and wait for death to arrive.
Sneaking up close, Sarai and the guys peeked over a little ledge to the fan-girls below. They were parading around showing off their strange clothes and even stranger make-up, while pretending to be guarding the castle.
“I have an idea!” exclaimed Sarai. “We’ll grab one of those girls and knock her out then take her clothes and make up and sneak in.”
“One problem, Sarai.” Said Yo.
“What’s that?”
“We aren’t girls.”
“Oh. That’s okay, you are effeminate enough that you’ll be able to pull it off. Hurry, we don’t have much time, God only knows what Twink is doing to her in there.”
The sand was slipping through faster and faster, Pomme began to really worry that no one was going to rescue her. The shoes were even more tempting to try to take off, but she couldn’t seem to figure out a way, it was as if they were a part of her DNA.
“Well, this sucks. At least I won’t have to be buried in these things, that’s something to be happy about at least.” She mumbled.
Finally a fan-girl came too close to the group and they knocked her out taking her make-up and clothes. Dressing themselves up, they snuck into the castle.
“Which way Sarai?” asked Yo.
“This way!” Sarai ran up some spiral stairs, swirling higher and higher into the castle until they came to a big wooden door.
“Pomegranate are you in there?” asked Miyavi, knocking on the door.
“Yes! I’m here, oh hurry, the hourglass is almost empty and she wants to freaking cook me!”
Using their brute strength, the boys and Sarai knocked down the door, then grabbing Pomme’s hand began to run back down the spiral stairs. Unfortunately, at the bottom was Twink and an entire army of fan-girls waiting.
“I can’t believe you thought it would be that easy!” cried Twink, laughing a horrible laugh.
“Well, I don’t either, considering how freaking hard this entire thing has been so far.” Replied Sarai.
“Shut up, Smart Ass.” Snapped Twink, her dull eyes flaring for one second. “Now you all will die. Slowly. I won’t have to worry about food for months, you will all do just fine.”
Thinking on her feet, Pomegranate spied a bucket of what looked like a thick white cheese. Quickly she picked it up and hurled the stuff onto Twink.
“Ah!” screamed Twink, steam rising off of her. “What the hell?! What have you done? Is this… It is! You threw TOFU on me! NO! My one weakness! What a beautiful world, all that wickedness and you had to destroy it with Tofu. How could a good little girl like you do such a thing.”
The steam continued to rise off of Twink until all that was left was her horrible clothing, the “Meat is Murder” button and the stench of Herpes. With that, the Wicked Bitch of the West died.
“Quick,” cried Sarai. “Grab the button and let’s get the hell out of here! The fan-girls don’t seem too happy!”
Quickly Gackt grabbed the button and grabbed Pomme’s hand, dragging her toward the exit. They fled from the castle and somehow managed to lose the fan-girls in the mix.
Exhausted and happy, the group arrived back at the Wizard’s castle where a slightly bored Trent led them to the throne room to speak with the Wizard.
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